Transactions with Beauty

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Bit of a Hodgepodge

I vacillated and even dithered over using the word hodgepodge in my post title, or calling it something like “running madly off in all directions.” The trouble is that then I start looking things up, and want to know the origins of the words and quotations, and then I think, maybe another word would do better. (Perhaps what I want is a mish mash?) And then the whole post could turn into a post on alternative post titles. The thing is, I’ve been all over the place, and can’t really settle on any one topic, so thought I’d just tell you what I’ve been reading and watching and doing, that sort of thing. Okay? Brilliant.

So here we are in my living room, in the photos. And there you have my/our stack of still life books. I’m still having fun with that series, and you can see some more of them on my instagram.

This past week I went to visit our daughter in Oakville, and it was just such a thrill to hang out with her. I can’t wait to have her here again at Christmas. In the meantime, though, I’ll be doing a little travelling, so stay tuned for that. I’m hoping to maybe pop up a blog post when I’m away, but no promises. Many photos will be taken, that much is true.

So, the book that blew my mind last week was Make It Scream Make it Burn by Leslie Jamison. There’s an interview with her in the Paris Review titled Rigorous Grace, and that it is. I love her Empathy Exams as well, and recommend them both so highly.

From the interview:

Which all comes back to your observations about surprise! Surprise is sometimes my working definition of God. Or grace. I’ve been thinking a lot about this thing that the comedian Kyle Kinane says in one of his stand-up routines, that a miracle is just the world letting you know it can still surprise you. He’s talking about burning his laundry. The first time I heard that, I was driving across the Arizona desert in the middle of this pretty surreal, wonderful, uncategorizable fever dream with another person, and I thought, amen. Being surprised means staying humble, means being perpetually being reminded of everything you don’t know, everything you didn’t understand. Getting expanded. You’re right that many of my essays are about surprise, or are trying to find forms or structures or lines of inquiry and narrative that can dramatize surprise. I want to let it unfold on the page, rather than simply fast-forwarding to revelation or certainty. I actually think that much of my definition of rigor comes back to surprise. Among other things, rigor means letting yourself get surprised over and over again, submitting to that ongoing dislocation.


Reading this book just made me want to write with so much more rigour. Gah. So. Much. More.

So how about music? I heard of the group Pomplamoos thanks to Karen’s blog. If you don’t check in with her blog, I recommend it.

Speaking of blogs, I know you must read Kerry’s Pickle Me This? Her post on complicated-ness was so good.

I loved Austin Kleon’s post and reminder about finding your people and how that’s more important than being an influencer or growing some huge unknowable audience.

I’ve also loved listening to more Blondie, spurred on by listening to this cool video of Heart of Glass with Debbie Harry’s vocals isolated.

A photographer I’m inspired by is Suzanne Saroff. Her work is so pure and careful and surprising.

Do you follow John Pavlovitz? Hi recent post on “The Privilege of Positivity” is worth a read, I think. It can’t be all kittens and pretty flowers, though, as he says, we need those too.

Another thing I’m inspired by is the recent restoration of Plautilla Melli’s painting:

I haven’t listened to Ghosteen by Nick Cave yet, because I’m waiting for some time to just soak it in, but I’ve subscribed to his Red Hand Files, and really love what he does there.

In other hodgepodge-y stuff, I don’t know if I’ve mentioned that I’ve been working out and quite loving it. As you know, the dog is no longer with us, and hasn’t been for a year and a half. (Sometimes it feels like he’s just around the corner in the living room, other times he’s been gone for so so long). For a while I continued with my walks, but then it got cold, as it does in Edmonton 90 percent of the year and I was becoming a bit of a fair-weather walker. Which won’t do. So then I got on the treadmill in our messy basement. And then, I started to lift weights, just a few dumbbell exercises. Recently we went to Canadian Tire and brought home some heavier ones. The truth is that I probably haven’t lost a single pound, but I’m feeling stronger and healthier and basically resigned to this body that I have in one way, but also feeling very empowered by feeling stronger. There. And I might even have to go back to the Canadian Tire and buy the next couple dumbbell weights up from the ones I have. You can do a lot of exercises with just a couple of them, and it doesn’t take much time. So there’s my keep fit recommendation.

But also, really, just have fun, dance. Be who you are. And that’s from Miranda, who is my hero. I love her so much.

We’ve also been watching Schitt’s Creek — a couple of seasons in and finding it rather perfect. Dan Levy is my new favourite person. Just love him. And of course it’s brought back memories for us of SCTV which we’ve been quoting to our daughter her whole life.

Lastly, I would have loved to have heard Brandi Carlile perform Joni Mitchell’s Blue in its entirety. But here’s a sample to leave you with: